A tablespoon of drama

Lately I've wavered back and forth between feeling very at peace with a lengthy adoption wait and feeling like I should be doing something to help it along. More often than not, I'm feeling both at the same time somehow: I'm happy waiting, but would like to at least try to speed it up somehow.

So with the referral of a friend, we looked into employing a consulting firm to help our chances. They would put us in front of many more birth families which would naturally just increase our odds. It seemed like a great idea so I printed out the application form, filled it out and had it sitting on my table just waiting for Bryan to look at it before we sent it in.

And then...

THEN!

Then I got a call from our social worker asking us if we would like to be presented to a Texas family with an 8 month old they are looking to find a permanent home for. I don't have many details so I'm not going to speculate on their family situation too much, but for whatever reason they feel they cannot provide this little girl with a stable life.

I actually feel extremely calm about it; I'm shocked at the lack of anxiety I'm feeling in general. Is it possible I actually learned something from the last time this happened?! It appears so :) In any case, we would love to give this child a home but we know we simply may not get picked and that is okay.

In the meantime, I guess we are going to delay the consulting by a couple of weeks and if this chica isn't meant to be ours we'll at least have a great back up plan to help find The One eventually.

Happy St. Nick's!