The other day we were driving in the car and this was my conversation with Simon:
Simon - {Sadly} I don't want to be a birth father...
Me - What do you mean?
Simon - {Upset and teary now} I don't want to be a birth father because then I won't be able to live with you anymore...
This is a very abbreviated version of our exchange, but you get the idea. He was very upset about being a birth father someday and very much associated it with not living with his family. It was SO INTERESTING to hear him articulate what he thought a birth father was - someone who didn't live with their family. It's amazing what he has picked up on. It makes me wonder if we should really try to explain things better to him but it's very difficult. He understands so much, but so little at the same time. I don't know what to really do about this one except assure him right now that we love him (and his sister) very much and we'll always be a family.
There has got to be a book on this.
--
We got a beautiful letter from Cecilia's birth mother this week. She had a lot to say about God, how she is using her faith to get through this time and how she so badly wants to turn her life around. It was well written with beautiful penmanship; I hope this letter was the first of many. Whenever I think about it I just go back to the thought that Cecilia has two mommas who love her in their own unique ways and that makes her a lucky little girl.
I pray she sees it that way someday.
--
Part of what took me so long to jump on the adoption train was this: "How could I love another person as much as I love Simon? Wouldn't it be that much harder if it weren't my biological child?" Well, I'm here to tell you folks that that was pure nonsense. Now I wonder if I would have another child (through any route) if I'd love that one as much as I love the two I have now :)
I'm so glad we finally did jump on the adoption train and found our way to this beautiful baby...I think we are all better for it.
Simon - {Sadly} I don't want to be a birth father...
Me - What do you mean?
Simon - {Upset and teary now} I don't want to be a birth father because then I won't be able to live with you anymore...
This is a very abbreviated version of our exchange, but you get the idea. He was very upset about being a birth father someday and very much associated it with not living with his family. It was SO INTERESTING to hear him articulate what he thought a birth father was - someone who didn't live with their family. It's amazing what he has picked up on. It makes me wonder if we should really try to explain things better to him but it's very difficult. He understands so much, but so little at the same time. I don't know what to really do about this one except assure him right now that we love him (and his sister) very much and we'll always be a family.
There has got to be a book on this.
--
We got a beautiful letter from Cecilia's birth mother this week. She had a lot to say about God, how she is using her faith to get through this time and how she so badly wants to turn her life around. It was well written with beautiful penmanship; I hope this letter was the first of many. Whenever I think about it I just go back to the thought that Cecilia has two mommas who love her in their own unique ways and that makes her a lucky little girl.
I pray she sees it that way someday.
--
Part of what took me so long to jump on the adoption train was this: "How could I love another person as much as I love Simon? Wouldn't it be that much harder if it weren't my biological child?" Well, I'm here to tell you folks that that was pure nonsense. Now I wonder if I would have another child (through any route) if I'd love that one as much as I love the two I have now :)
I'm so glad we finally did jump on the adoption train and found our way to this beautiful baby...I think we are all better for it.
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