I did get A call today. One that I hope is the start of a new, crazy adventure. One that has my hopes skyrocketing, but those hopes could come crashing back down to earth in a hurry.
Goodbye sleep, I will miss you for a few weeks...hopefully more!
My social worker called today to tell me there is a 19 year old Wisconsin woman who is looking for a family for her baby girl, due September 21st. Despite fearing the adoption laws in Wisconsin, we have agreed to be presented to her because how could we really say no?! This woman will be looking at a small handful of families, including ours, and will be deciding who she wants to meet face to face with in the next week or so. Lynn sounded excited for us, which (for better or worse) totally rubbed off!
Now I'm (unsuccessfully) trying to hold back the tears of joy because - let's face it - even if by some kind of miracle this particular baby becomes ours we still have a long journey ahead. This feeling reminds me of getting all those positive pregnancy tests over the years. The feeling of elation, excitement, hope and anxiety all wrapped together. You just pray with all your heart that this time will be different...that this time will be it.
All we can do now is keep waiting. DEEP BREATHS....
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P.S.
I just want to make it clear that we have not been picked yet. The only difference now is that we know someone will be looking at our portfolio who wants a young couple and that "we have a few other things she's looking for." There is simply a known potential at this point. I'll keep you all posted of course :)
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Monday, August 22, 2011
Welcome to Las Vegas
I spend the final day in my 20s and the first day in my 30s in a way I never expected....partying in Vegas. And of course by "partying" I mean walking, eating, relaxing and getting to bed at a reasonable hour (hello, I'm 30...not 20).
I've decided to whip up a little highlight reel here...why? Because I want to remember it all.
-At MKE a random stranger gave me a random compliment....a good start to the weekend and a boost to my confidence as an almost 30 year old.
-We arrived to 100+ degree weather. The weatherman said it was 5 to 10 degrees higher than normal hence it was labeled a "heat wave," which I found comical.
-We got checked into our hotel and started walking. Forever. Walking from one hotel to the next on the strip is deceiving as everything is over-sized thus giving the illusion that you are not far from where you want to be (key word: illusion).
-We went to the pool in the afternoon but a kid pooped in it right before we got there. Apparently Trump guests are too cool for E-Coli poisoning.
-We ate at a Mario Batali restaurant at The Venetian and it was EASILY one of the best meals I've ever had. Ever.
-The next day was pretty much the same as the one before only we went to the wax museum and saw Mystere (Cirque du Soleil), which was both amazing and trippy. We sat in the 4th row on the end and one of the performers literally scaled the railing right next to me...I was as close to him as I was to Bryan. I left feeling like I may have missed my calling in life - to get paid to fly and flip around attached to bungees? Oh how I would LOVE to do that for a living. In another life :)
--
The next thing I knew, we were in our driveway and Simon was in my arms. Back to reality! Time to settle in and do all the things thirty year olds are supposed to do...wear makeup, do their hair, save sweatpants for the gym, go to the gym, always have a clean house, greet everyone with a warm smile and just be plain put together.
Anyone else associate "thirty" with something akin to the Stepford Wives? :)
I've decided to whip up a little highlight reel here...why? Because I want to remember it all.
-At MKE a random stranger gave me a random compliment....a good start to the weekend and a boost to my confidence as an almost 30 year old.
-We arrived to 100+ degree weather. The weatherman said it was 5 to 10 degrees higher than normal hence it was labeled a "heat wave," which I found comical.
-We got checked into our hotel and started walking. Forever. Walking from one hotel to the next on the strip is deceiving as everything is over-sized thus giving the illusion that you are not far from where you want to be (key word: illusion).
-We went to the pool in the afternoon but a kid pooped in it right before we got there. Apparently Trump guests are too cool for E-Coli poisoning.
-We ate at a Mario Batali restaurant at The Venetian and it was EASILY one of the best meals I've ever had. Ever.
-The next day was pretty much the same as the one before only we went to the wax museum and saw Mystere (Cirque du Soleil), which was both amazing and trippy. We sat in the 4th row on the end and one of the performers literally scaled the railing right next to me...I was as close to him as I was to Bryan. I left feeling like I may have missed my calling in life - to get paid to fly and flip around attached to bungees? Oh how I would LOVE to do that for a living. In another life :)
--
The next thing I knew, we were in our driveway and Simon was in my arms. Back to reality! Time to settle in and do all the things thirty year olds are supposed to do...wear makeup, do their hair, save sweatpants for the gym, go to the gym, always have a clean house, greet everyone with a warm smile and just be plain put together.
Anyone else associate "thirty" with something akin to the Stepford Wives? :)
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Backpack Time
I decided to take Simon to pick out his backpack for preschool today. Rookie mistake. It's August 13th and apparently by August 13th all the character backpacks are long gone. Luckily by the time we got to the store Simon was so excited to be picking out his very own backpack that he really didn't care what was on it, despite requesting a "show" backpack on the way there.
He was happy with one that had a dinosaur on it and I was happy that it cost me less than five bucks....
But for the first time, I felt that urge parents must feel when they spend obscene amounts of money on clothing so their kids fit in. I don't intend to fall victim to such frivolity, but for the first time I understood how it happens....I better get my act together before Simon winds up a spoiled brat wearing everything Guess and Girbaud (those are still "in" right?).
Anyways, after I had fleeting worries about whether my three year old will fit in at preschool if he has a cheap backpack (a totally valid worry, I know), I looked over and saw how freaking cute he is and realized that with a face like this he's gonna be golden...which I can say because I'm his mama :)
He was happy with one that had a dinosaur on it and I was happy that it cost me less than five bucks....
But for the first time, I felt that urge parents must feel when they spend obscene amounts of money on clothing so their kids fit in. I don't intend to fall victim to such frivolity, but for the first time I understood how it happens....I better get my act together before Simon winds up a spoiled brat wearing everything Guess and Girbaud (those are still "in" right?).
Anyways, after I had fleeting worries about whether my three year old will fit in at preschool if he has a cheap backpack (a totally valid worry, I know), I looked over and saw how freaking cute he is and realized that with a face like this he's gonna be golden...which I can say because I'm his mama :)
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Friday, August 12, 2011
Update
I emailed my social worker for an update on August 1st. No response.
Then again on August 5th. No response.
Then I called on August 8th. No response.
Then I emailed again today, August 12th. A response!
My last email was a shade bitchy so I guess that was motivation enough for her to respond to me. Ultimately, as anticipated, there really wasn't much of an update to give. She did tell me that the only families that have been matched in the last month have either been boys or from states that we did not wish to adopt from (for a variety of reasons).
It's already tempting to change some of our preferences so that we have a better shot at getting picked sooner, but I'm trying to remember that we picked certain things for a reason and in a time when patience (or impatience) wasn't really a factor. For now, we're going to keep trusting our original decisions and keep waiting it out!
Then again on August 5th. No response.
Then I called on August 8th. No response.
Then I emailed again today, August 12th. A response!
My last email was a shade bitchy so I guess that was motivation enough for her to respond to me. Ultimately, as anticipated, there really wasn't much of an update to give. She did tell me that the only families that have been matched in the last month have either been boys or from states that we did not wish to adopt from (for a variety of reasons).
It's already tempting to change some of our preferences so that we have a better shot at getting picked sooner, but I'm trying to remember that we picked certain things for a reason and in a time when patience (or impatience) wasn't really a factor. For now, we're going to keep trusting our original decisions and keep waiting it out!
Thursday, August 11, 2011
"our baby"
This week I was gifted a baby toy. I put it in my car and this is what ran through Simon's brain (and therefore came out of his mouth):
"When can I see our baby? I really want to see our baby. I want to show her how to use this toy. Why can't we see her? I think Daddy is going to be really surprised when she comes. When is she coming? When can she play with that toy? I want to keep it in the toy room so she can play with it. When will she be big like Jackson? Will she be able to pet Elliot? Elliot always runs away from me. How will she use her arms to pet Elliot? When can we see her?"
All I could say was that I really wanted to see her too and I wish I knew when that day was going to come. It kind of breaks my heart that I can't give him an answer, but one of my preggo friends put a really positive spin on the not knowing part of all of this. She is one of those nutters (love you) who doesn't want to find out the gender and won't spill the beans on their favorite names. She reminded me that I already know the gender and will probably get a name all settled so having a little surprise in the form of a "due date" just adds some fun to it.
I can try to accept that :)
"When can I see our baby? I really want to see our baby. I want to show her how to use this toy. Why can't we see her? I think Daddy is going to be really surprised when she comes. When is she coming? When can she play with that toy? I want to keep it in the toy room so she can play with it. When will she be big like Jackson? Will she be able to pet Elliot? Elliot always runs away from me. How will she use her arms to pet Elliot? When can we see her?"
All I could say was that I really wanted to see her too and I wish I knew when that day was going to come. It kind of breaks my heart that I can't give him an answer, but one of my preggo friends put a really positive spin on the not knowing part of all of this. She is one of those nutters (love you) who doesn't want to find out the gender and won't spill the beans on their favorite names. She reminded me that I already know the gender and will probably get a name all settled so having a little surprise in the form of a "due date" just adds some fun to it.
I can try to accept that :)
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Tri it. You might like it.
{I love a good pun.}
You may recall that about in mid-June I discussed a new goal. I decided to train for a triathlon and wanted to beat Bryan who would be racing the same day, only going about twice the distance. I'm happy to report that it wasn't even close...my husband is MUCH faster than I am, but not TWICE as fast :)
I want to remember the day, learn from my mistakes and convince more people to join me next time so here are all the details:
1/4 Mile Swim.
The race started with the swim. The part I had no worries about. The part I felt prepared for. The part that I sucked the most in, naturally. Think about going to Noah's Ark and trying to swim through the wave pool when the waves are winding down a bit, only the water is black and people are everywhere. You need to keep moving forward, but you can't quite find a rhythm because you don't want to get kicked in the face or breathe in the water that won't stop splashing in your face. Ultimately, I tried the side stroke, back stroke, doggy paddle and breast stroke to get myself from A to B....the front crawl, which I exclusively trained with, was useless.
The good news was that I was in the seventh wave, which meant there were six waves of people peeing in the water before me to heat it up (or maybe it was from all the 90 degree days we've been having) so the water temperature was beautiful, perfect even. Also, despite tiring out unexpectedly early and having to leave the front crawl at the shore, I felt safe. I knew that at any time I could just tread water, float on my back or flag down a lifeguard if needed. Next time I will use a wetsuit to feel even safer and to conserve my energy as they provide buoyancy.
My point? The swim was crazy, but doable. Definitely worth the challenge and definitely not nearly scary enough to turn me away from more triathlons....and shouldn't be enough to turn you away either.
16 Mile Bike.
This part was fun. Until that day, I had never used a road bike (think super lightweight frame and anorexic wheels). I learned how to use the gears going slowly around our neighborhood the night before, but that was it. As it turned out, spinning regularly was a really effective way to train and I felt like my legs could handle it. I kept hearing my spin instructor yelling "HIT IT" and I would amp it up every so often. If I really knew how to use the gears I think I could have shaved more time off, but it kept grinding at me and I kept worrying that a wheel was going to fall off so I would slow down just in case (luckily, I did not fall nor did the wheel fall off).
All in all, this was probably my favorite part and coincidentally the part that was always my reason for not wanting to do a triathlon until now because I simply didn't care for biking. Just goes to show that sometimes you can surprise yourself.
3.1 Mile Run.
I was the most afraid for the run because it's at the end. I've run 3.1 miles hundreds of times probably, but never after both swimming and biking. It was impossible to gauge how fast I was going. I was just trying to propel myself forward by putting one foot in front of the other. The old quads were tight from the bike and I was convinced that the first mile marker had to be wrong. After that initial mile, though, I started to feel normal and was able to pick up the pace a little. Ultimately, the run felt a bit odd but I was happy with my time (despite the fact that my sister beat me on the run by 13 seconds...I think she cheated).
1 Hour 33 Minutes.
It was a fun hour and thirty three minutes. One that I'd like to repeat, only faster. It didn't take an obscene amount of time to train for it and I never got burned out on any one part (which happens to me if I run too much). All in all, it was a great experience and so much fun.
You (yes, YOU) should do it.
You may recall that about in mid-June I discussed a new goal. I decided to train for a triathlon and wanted to beat Bryan who would be racing the same day, only going about twice the distance. I'm happy to report that it wasn't even close...my husband is MUCH faster than I am, but not TWICE as fast :)
I want to remember the day, learn from my mistakes and convince more people to join me next time so here are all the details:
1/4 Mile Swim.
The race started with the swim. The part I had no worries about. The part I felt prepared for. The part that I sucked the most in, naturally. Think about going to Noah's Ark and trying to swim through the wave pool when the waves are winding down a bit, only the water is black and people are everywhere. You need to keep moving forward, but you can't quite find a rhythm because you don't want to get kicked in the face or breathe in the water that won't stop splashing in your face. Ultimately, I tried the side stroke, back stroke, doggy paddle and breast stroke to get myself from A to B....the front crawl, which I exclusively trained with, was useless.
The good news was that I was in the seventh wave, which meant there were six waves of people peeing in the water before me to heat it up (or maybe it was from all the 90 degree days we've been having) so the water temperature was beautiful, perfect even. Also, despite tiring out unexpectedly early and having to leave the front crawl at the shore, I felt safe. I knew that at any time I could just tread water, float on my back or flag down a lifeguard if needed. Next time I will use a wetsuit to feel even safer and to conserve my energy as they provide buoyancy.
My point? The swim was crazy, but doable. Definitely worth the challenge and definitely not nearly scary enough to turn me away from more triathlons....and shouldn't be enough to turn you away either.
16 Mile Bike.
This part was fun. Until that day, I had never used a road bike (think super lightweight frame and anorexic wheels). I learned how to use the gears going slowly around our neighborhood the night before, but that was it. As it turned out, spinning regularly was a really effective way to train and I felt like my legs could handle it. I kept hearing my spin instructor yelling "HIT IT" and I would amp it up every so often. If I really knew how to use the gears I think I could have shaved more time off, but it kept grinding at me and I kept worrying that a wheel was going to fall off so I would slow down just in case (luckily, I did not fall nor did the wheel fall off).
All in all, this was probably my favorite part and coincidentally the part that was always my reason for not wanting to do a triathlon until now because I simply didn't care for biking. Just goes to show that sometimes you can surprise yourself.
3.1 Mile Run.
I was the most afraid for the run because it's at the end. I've run 3.1 miles hundreds of times probably, but never after both swimming and biking. It was impossible to gauge how fast I was going. I was just trying to propel myself forward by putting one foot in front of the other. The old quads were tight from the bike and I was convinced that the first mile marker had to be wrong. After that initial mile, though, I started to feel normal and was able to pick up the pace a little. Ultimately, the run felt a bit odd but I was happy with my time (despite the fact that my sister beat me on the run by 13 seconds...I think she cheated).
1 Hour 33 Minutes.
It was a fun hour and thirty three minutes. One that I'd like to repeat, only faster. It didn't take an obscene amount of time to train for it and I never got burned out on any one part (which happens to me if I run too much). All in all, it was a great experience and so much fun.
You (yes, YOU) should do it.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Sleep
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| Last night we heard a thump and assumed Simon was still awake. I went in to see him sound asleep like this (and yes, I realize he is in fleece footie jammies in August, but since it wasn't terribly hot yesterday I didn't fight it). |
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| We picked this animal up from Grandma Berta's after Taylor Weekend and within 5 minutes he was out. He didn't even wake up when I wiped the make-up off his face. |
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| This is what I found on my bed one evening when I went up to bed. He must have been too tired to climb all the way to the pillows. It was funny for one night, and luckily it did not become a habit :) |
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Taylor Weekend Number 7
Our friend's parents live on a lake just outside of Eagle River and they have a hunting cabin in their backyard that sleeps 10 or so people. The Taylor family has graciously accepted a group of us for a weekend every year since 2006 (plus another in '03) and I assume we will all keep trying our best to make it happen every year until it's just plain impossible. We swim out to a raft, play board games, play yard games, sit around the fire, go tubing, eat, drink, talk, laugh, relax, etc.
With any trip, I think there's often just one or two events that really stand out.
The first, which I will not go into much detail about, was how an afternoon thunderstorm lead to a few gals consuming a few too many drinks. I think. It's a little hazy.
The second will surely not be as funny to those not in our car, but if I'm ever in a bad mood I'm going to find this post, read it and laugh:
On the way up, Tiffany insisted on turning around to help a car in the ditch. On this rescue mission I stayed in the car assuming it was a trap (Law & Order anyone?), while Danielle and Bryan slowly approached the distressed vehicle. Meanwhile, Tiffany seemed stuck. I saw her head bob down abruptly and the door closed on her. It seemed a lone patch of wet grass was thwarting her attempts at heroics. After she wiped out the second time, she just decided to get back in the car with me to watch the action from afar.
We watched as Bryan put on a brave face and reached into the car; he pulled out an overweight, middle-aged gentlemen with an open jacket and a lot of chest hair blowing in the wind (where his shirt was, we're not sure). Bryan and Danielle started to back away as the man wobbled around insisting that the police were on their way. When they got back into the car they asked Tiffany why she didn't go try to help after making us turn the car around in the first place. I tried to explain with a straight face that she was physically unable to maneuver around the door....I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard. I love Taylor weekend :)
With any trip, I think there's often just one or two events that really stand out.
The first, which I will not go into much detail about, was how an afternoon thunderstorm lead to a few gals consuming a few too many drinks. I think. It's a little hazy.
The second will surely not be as funny to those not in our car, but if I'm ever in a bad mood I'm going to find this post, read it and laugh:
On the way up, Tiffany insisted on turning around to help a car in the ditch. On this rescue mission I stayed in the car assuming it was a trap (Law & Order anyone?), while Danielle and Bryan slowly approached the distressed vehicle. Meanwhile, Tiffany seemed stuck. I saw her head bob down abruptly and the door closed on her. It seemed a lone patch of wet grass was thwarting her attempts at heroics. After she wiped out the second time, she just decided to get back in the car with me to watch the action from afar.
We watched as Bryan put on a brave face and reached into the car; he pulled out an overweight, middle-aged gentlemen with an open jacket and a lot of chest hair blowing in the wind (where his shirt was, we're not sure). Bryan and Danielle started to back away as the man wobbled around insisting that the police were on their way. When they got back into the car they asked Tiffany why she didn't go try to help after making us turn the car around in the first place. I tried to explain with a straight face that she was physically unable to maneuver around the door....I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard. I love Taylor weekend :)
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| This is from 2010....I'm waiting to for someone to email me one from this year. It's all the same people except this year a Jones brother stayed home and the other Jones brother brought his girlfriend. |
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