Bedtime

There are people out there who just LOVE the bedtime routine with their kids....the baths, the snuggling, the books, etc., etc. I, on the other hand, desperately just want bedtime. The routine can suck it.

I know this isn't the first time I've posted about bedtime, and it probably won't be the last because bedtime is quite possibly the most challenging part of my day. After a whole day of playing Woman vs. Toddler I am done with the negotiations, the games, the wining, (the parenting)....you get the idea. Simon always has a different idea of how it's going to go, though. This kid always puts his game face on and is ready to test me one last time for the day. Every. Night.

He sits on the potty forever. He won't let me brush his teeth. He picks out the LONGEST effing books. He just cannot decide which jammies are going to be the most comfy that night and hell if mom is going to pick them out for him. He needs water. He needs to go potty again. He needs another hug. Another kiss. Another hug from Daddy. Oh and another hug from Mommy. Fifteen minutes later he's still thirsty. He might have to go potty again.

He thinks he has a fever and needs medicine (his words, no joke).

Truthfully bedtime really does challenge me, but it's been getting better because we start out offering to read him 3 books. If he screws with us, he gets one taken away. If he screws with us again, we take another away. It's been working like a dream.  There's also this new children's book out there that might get him to understand just how badly I want him to go to sleep. I was emailed a copy of this book, but I'm not computer savvy enough to figure out how to present it to you via this blog, so instead please enjoy this excerpt. It speaks to me.

"The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest
And the creatures who crawl, run, and creep.
I know you’re not thirsty. That’s bullshit. Stop lying.
Lie the fuck down, my darling, and sleep."